You trust that they’ll do what needs to be done in a way that serves them best. You stay in a neural state.Īs you learn to be in your own business, you let others be in theirs. It’s even harder to quiet the mind in a way that you stop thinking interfering or judgmental thoughts. It’s not easy to not offer advice or act on behalf of others. To know the parameters of your own business and to stick to them is an art. Most of the time it will be about you offering sympathy, compassion and understanding rather than judgment, advice and opinions. If a friend needs a compassionate ear, you listen intently, without showering her with advice. You focus internally on your own life and your own business. The art of minding your business involves: But if someone is talking about a painful breakup or a challenge at work, you don’t necessarily need to butt in. For example if someone is drowning, you will either try to save them or you’ll get help. When it’s a matter of life and death, the action required is pretty clear. Knowing when to get involved in other people’s business (or not) is an art. Why did you do it? What can you learn from it? The art of minding your own business
Think about the times you got involved and offered unsolicited advice or help.
The flip side of this is: we don’t trust that others are capable of taking care of their own business. We will feel guilty if we don’t get involved. We take it upon ourselves to feel responsible for everybody’s business.
#Minding my business how to#
We feel the need to tell others how to act or what to do in order to comply with “what should be”. We have a view of how things should be and expect everyone to comply with such a view. We can guide them in changing their behavior and doing things the way we see fit-for them. The underlying reasons behind our behavior are usually one (or a combination) of the following. We can’t wait for the person to finish so we can jump in with our advice.
If it’s not an action, it’s with words or thoughts. Interfering in other people’s business can be so ingrained that we do it subconsciously most of the times. Why do we get into other people’s business? If you want to end your suffering of wanting to change things outside of your control, look within to see why you do it in the first place. We’re doing the world and ourselves a disservice. The thing is: when we are not focused internally, minding our own business, making sure that we’re following our own advice and living our lives truthfully, we won’t be able to help others. The world can include your spouse/partner, kids, coworkers, neighbors, your countrymen, politics, the environment, and an endless barrage of causes for concern. Instead you’re focused outwardly, looking for ways to fix the planet. When you walk around with the weight of the world on your shoulders, you won’t be able to focus on yourself. Other people can do the same thing to you, sticking their nose in your business. We feel anxious, stressed, disappointed, and discouraged. We try to give advice, dictate how things should (or shouldn’t) be, and complain when things don’t work out. If we suffer, it’s usually because we’re in somebody else’s business, not minding our own life and choices. Where do you draw the line between your business and other people’s business? “There are only three kinds of business in the universe: mine, yours, and God’s.” ~ Byron Katieĭo you think you’re responsible for the universe? Or do you stick to your own business?
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